49206C6F766520796F752E
My Recovery and Healing Mainframe.
> life_of_every_party.ps1
> death_of_every_relationship.ps1
> recovery.ps1
> healing.ps1
> love.ps1
>
"If you could kick the person in the pants responsible for most of your trouble, you wouldn’t sit for a month."-Theodore Roosevelt
Tag: scars
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This piece was written after avoidance failed and accountability became unavoidable. Behind Old Bellingham City Hall, with the bass of Drowning in the Drip grounding me in my body, I stayed present with the harm I caused, the consequences I earned, and the amends I am making without asking for forgiveness. This is not a…
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I’m living with an open heart and solid boundaries—and it feels really good. This piece is about choosing joy over fear, curiosity over conformity, and ethical connection over unhealthy attachment. It explores relationship anarchy, sobriety, self-trust, and the subtle art of the Irish goodbye as a way of protecting peace, staying aligned, and keeping the…
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This is not a villain story. It is an accountability story. Who I loved was real. What we built was real. And so was the damage I caused when fear, anxious attachment, and long-standing patterns took the wheel. I ended something meaningful in a way that created chaos, destabilization, and harm I cannot undo. When…
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Today wasn’t about fixing anything — it was about feeling everything. I went offline and spent five hours in a grief lodge, moving anger, loss, and decades of trapped emotion through my body. What started as calm chanting turned into a powerful, collective release that cracked me wide open. I screamed, cried, and finally let…
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A quiet moment on the beach turns into a reckoning with grief, not just for people lost, but for the version of myself that disappeared with sobriety. This is about mourning an old identity, honoring what it gave me, and choosing a truer life without pretending the grief ever fully ends.