> life_of_every_party.ps1
> death_of_every_relationship.ps1
> end_of_the_toxic_patterns.ps1
>
My Recovery and Healing Server.
My Programming Language.
My Operating System.My Applications. My Syntax.
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Tag: anxiety
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A scar doesn’t erase what was there before it. It just marks where the wound used to be. Sitting on a log, missing someone, I found myself staring at a scar on my leg and remembering what it replaced. This is about loss, grief, and what it means to let a wave come in, move…
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Standing in a sold out crowd of 10,000 people in Seattle on Saturday night, with lasers splitting the air above my head and bass moving through my chest and my platonic love wrapped around me and 82 days of complete sobriety underneath all of it, I started crying. Not the polite kind. The kind that…
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I need to tell you something about what healing actually looks like. Not the version people post about. Not the aesthetic. The real thing. The quiet, unglamorous, nobody-is-watching, random-Tuesday version of it. My last post was a big unnecessary explanation I should have never written. It’s the last one they’re getting. This one is about…
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Three days of real peace. Then Thursday happened and my nervous system decided to manufacture a full-blown crisis out of thin air. This is what it looks like when your rational mind is miles ahead and your body is still running trauma drills for a war that is already over. Also: a word to the…
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I woke up anxious and didn’t run. I faced anxiety and didn’t spiral. Thirty-seven days sober in the hardest season of my life, I chose movement over meltdown and discipline over drama. This dance isn’t performance. It’s proof. Identity death cracked me open, and what came back is steadier, sharper, and done selling out.