2KVYOT3.L0VE
Tukayote Helianthus v2
Walking away from suffering.Walking towards love.With intention.
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Tag: dopamine deficiency
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Grief used to be the thing I ran from. Now it shows up sharp as a thumbnail scratch, I say hello out loud, and it passes. Grief isn’t terrible. It’s proof I have a real beating heart.
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9 months ago I burned every bridge in my life to the ground. I filmed this dance a few weeks ago on the Whatcom Creek bridge with a train crossing behind me the whole time. The post today is about what 224 days of not giving in actually looks like from the inside, and why…
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Alone on the bridge over Whatcom Creek at midnight, the relapse happened. Thirty one years of buildup, no warning, nobody there to see it. I am not sorry, and honestly, I am proud of it.
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Two hundred days completely sober from every chemical, gotten in the hardest chapter of my life. Grief lodge, amends without asking forgiveness, being labeled by people I once trusted and loved, months of nervous system hell, a five year no contact order finally expiring, the manifesto that guided me, a peer support circle that never…
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Your brain doesn’t keep you stuck because it’s afraid of what’s ahead. It keeps you stuck because it’s afraid of losing what it already knows. I walked 12 miles, was flipped off by a person from my past still avoiding accountability for stealing money from me, got hit by a mail truck right after, and…