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My Recovery and Healing Mainframe.
> life_of_every_party.ps1
> death_of_every_relationship.ps1
> recovery.ps1
> healing.ps1
> love.ps1
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"If you could kick the person in the pants responsible for most of your trouble, you wouldn’t sit for a month."-Theodore Roosevelt
Tag: recovery
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I was drunk, bleeding on the ground at 2AM after a 7 mile walk home from work. It took two more years and two more intoxicated ER psych visits before I fully understood the grip alcohol had on me. I’m still learning what the damage looks like. But today, I’m 341 days sober, and I’m…
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Anxiety has been with me since childhood. I’ve used a lot of things to numb it. Cannabis was one of the better ones — until I stopped cold turkey to prep for brain scans, and found out it had a death grip on me I never saw coming. Now I’m in full withdrawals, feeling terrible,…
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I grew up hearing “big boys don’t cry” and “shut up or I’ll give you something to cry about.” Turns out, so did a guy with two professor parents and a “Leave it to Beaver” childhood. Same message, different delivery. Same result: shame baked in so deep it ran my life for decades. Tonight I…
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I spent weeks brushing off the warning signs. By Saturday night I was drunk, paranoid, isolating, and convinced my life needed to end. Bipolar had full control and I refused every single person who tried to help. It took two syringes and a really long nap to slow me down. I’m out now, stable, sober,…
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The last few weeks have been some of the best of my life and some of the hardest. New partnerships, 17 mile walks, personal records, full heart. Also: a shame tornado, then a shame hurricane, then a second wave that took everything out. On my 199th day without smoking I had a lit cigarette in…